IDENTITY
by hollieastman
I am post-Valentines Day.
Don’t get me wrong, I’m not anti love/relationships but, just like a puppy at Christmas, they should be for life, not for a day. The day is supposedly about showing your love, with all couples totally absolutely involved in the whole I love you ordeal. If you really love someone should you really wait to be compelled by the greeting card companies to show your feelings? Wouldn’t it be better, dare I say more romantic even, if you did all the things that you are compelled to do on February 14th when you felt the volition to do so? No? Just a thought.
I don’t get it. How did a day originating from the martyrdom of two guys called Valentine which just happened to occur around the Roman fertility festivals snowball into the card buying frenzy that we now find ourselves thrust into? Feb 14th the Greeting cards companies second biggest earner after Christmas. Christmas I understand, there’s food, presents and a fat guy with a beard, but with Valentines all you get is an obese incontinent infant with wings firing arrows at unsuspecting victims and some semi dead over priced foliage if you’re lucky.
Today one may view Valentines days sole purpose in the universe is to make all single people feel depressed and all couples feel psychotically obliged to spend obscene amounts of money on oversized internal organs made out of chocolate, ill fitting indecent lingerie, and vomit inducing cards filled with sentiments more suited to a Fifty cent song than a Shakespearian sonnet. The original Valentines were beautiful verses scribed by Chaucer, but now they’re verbal diarrhoea “I well luv you darlinn” really moves me to tears, but only because of the appalling grammar.
I can’t comprehend the whole anonymity thing. On any other day of they year if you received dozen roses or a card from some supposed stranger declaring their undying love, you’d think you had fallen victim to a stalker, call the police, close all your curtains, set your facebook to private and expect to find a horse’s head in your bed. Yet when it happens on Vday it’s not considered psycho but romantic? Also there’s always the embarrassment of over riding doubt that the card isn’t actually from Mr or Mrs Right but your Mum.
I suggest the anti-valentines day. In Korea they have a Black Day, where all the guys who didn’t get anything for Vday meet up and eat black Jajangmyun noodles. But why stop with black food? This Vday make a stand, where all black, embrace your inner year 9, dye your hair black, paint your nails, you get the idea. Morn for the old pure days of Love when Clintons didn’t dictate how people felt, love was spelt correctly and “fittie” was not used as a redundant substitute for a compliment. Alternatively, focus on the whole anonymous gift giving idea and start sending birthday, anniversary, congratulations and sympathy cards to random addresses incognito. You’re bound to gain some new friendships, even if it is with the local police in the form of a restraining order.
And just think only 365 days till the next one… can’t wait!!
I am post-Valentines Day.
Don’t get me wrong, I’m not anti love/relationships but, just like a puppy at Christmas, they should be for life, not for a day. The day is supposedly about showing your love, with all couples totally absolutely involved in the whole I love you ordeal. If you really love someone should you really wait to be compelled by the greeting card companies to show your feelings? Wouldn’t it be better, dare I say more romantic even, if you did all the things that you are compelled to do on February 14th when you felt the volition to do so? No? Just a thought.
I don’t get it. How did a day originating from the martyrdom of two guys called Valentine which just happened to occur around the Roman fertility festivals snowball into the card buying frenzy that we now find ourselves thrust into? Feb 14th the Greeting cards companies second biggest earner after Christmas. Christmas I understand, there’s food, presents and a fat guy with a beard, but with Valentines all you get is an obese incontinent infant with wings firing arrows at unsuspecting victims and some semi dead over priced foliage if you’re lucky.
Today one may view Valentines days sole purpose in the universe is to make all single people feel depressed and all couples feel psychotically obliged to spend obscene amounts of money on oversized internal organs made out of chocolate, ill fitting indecent lingerie, and vomit inducing cards filled with sentiments more suited to a Fifty cent song than a Shakespearian sonnet. The original Valentines were beautiful verses scribed by Chaucer, but now they’re verbal diarrhoea “I well luv you darlinn” really moves me to tears, but only because of the appalling grammar.
I can’t comprehend the whole anonymity thing. On any other day of they year if you received dozen roses or a card from some supposed stranger declaring their undying love, you’d think you had fallen victim to a stalker, call the police, close all your curtains, set your facebook to private and expect to find a horse’s head in your bed. Yet when it happens on Vday it’s not considered psycho but romantic? Also there’s always the embarrassment of over riding doubt that the card isn’t actually from Mr or Mrs Right but your Mum.
I suggest the anti-valentines day. In Korea they have a Black Day, where all the guys who didn’t get anything for Vday meet up and eat black Jajangmyun noodles. But why stop with black food? This Vday make a stand, where all black, embrace your inner year 9, dye your hair black, paint your nails, you get the idea. Morn for the old pure days of Love when Clintons didn’t dictate how people felt, love was spelt correctly and “fittie” was not used as a redundant substitute for a compliment. Alternatively, focus on the whole anonymous gift giving idea and start sending birthday, anniversary, congratulations and sympathy cards to random addresses incognito. You’re bound to gain some new friendships, even if it is with the local police in the form of a restraining order.
And just think only 365 days till the next one… can’t wait!!
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